Wise Choices?

Are we making wise choices in our homes? I recently asked myself this question. It stemmed from a choice I made at home. We were hanging out as a family on a Saturday night. We all wanted to watch a movie and just relax. Our youngest daughter was already in bed, so it was my wife and I, our 22 year old son and his wife, our 13 year old daughter, and one of our spiritual sons. We were trying to figure out a movie that would be appropriate for us to watch. There was a new release out that no one had seen yet. I had heard that it was a good movie, but there was some mild language in it. We went back and forth on whether to watch it or not. So we decided to rent it on the pay per view. It wasn’t long into the movie when the inappropriate language started. I figured I would give it another chance. I mean I really wanted to see the movie. It was a good action flick from what I was told. Well I chose to watch the movie even though I felt a little uncomfortable. I compromised with myself. I figured it was later in the evening and it was time for our 13 year old to go to bed. So we put her to bed. I told myself that it would be ok to watch the movie now, since it was just us and our adult children. Well I can tell you that the language was horrendous. The movie ended late; in fact my wife fell asleep during it. I went to work the next day. It was at work where I felt God convict me. I compromised with my rules that my wife and I had set regarding movies that are appropriate for us. Not only did I compromise, I felt like I chased our 13 year old daughter off to bed so I wouldn’t feel as guilty. It just came down to the fact, as servant leader I let my guard down. Not was I only upset with myself, but I was also upset with my wife for allowing me to make that decision. I was trying to shift some of the blame. I then thought about Adam’s response to God after they ate the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Genesis 3:12- Then the man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.” I was convicted, not only on the decision I made to watch the movie, but for also trying to include my wife along with me. I asked God to forgive me and accepted full responsibility for my actions. This is part of walking as a godly man. It’s not trying to go through life as a perfect person, but taking ownership of our failures and giving them to God. I also new I needed to ask for forgiveness from my family. The next day I got off work and before dinner when we were all together, I apologized to my wife, daughter, son, and daughter-in-law. I asked for forgiveness and explained that I made a bad decision to watch that movie. I want my children to see what a godly man looks like. I know that I have made mistakes, and I will make mistakes as a husband, a father, and a son. But I want to teach my children through my actions how to accept responsibility and deal with the consequences for our choices we make. Good or bad. Proverbs 22:6- “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” I was not proud of the decision I made that night, but I had a choice on how to handle it. I could have just brushed it off and gotten over it. Or I could have just ended it after asking God for forgiveness. But I want to be a godly man. I want to hand down a legacy to my children and the generations to come. I want to show my children what it means and how it looks to take ownership of their mistakes. That it is ok to stumble, but we must get back up and turn to God and lean on him. Psalm 37:24-“Though he stumble, he will not fall. For the Lord upholds him with His hand.” I want my children to know how to ask for forgiveness, even though it is not always easy, but that it takes a humble heart. I thank God for opening up my eyes. I can truly say that God is good to me. So as parents, even when we make poor choices, we need to own up to it. When we wrong our children, we need to ask for forgiveness from them. Not only do we teach our children, but we need to show them what it looks like in our every day life. What does love, forgiveness, grace, mercy, kindness, patience, transparency, peace, joy, and the list goes on. What do these things look like in your home? Are you teaching and showing these to your children every day? Is your home a safe haven for your children? Do their friends want to always be at your house? I know we as parents can always do a better job. It starts with our walk with the Lord. Jesus paid the ultimate price. Not just for our sins, but so we could be more like Him. Ask God today to show you how to be that parent He wants you to be. We can become godly models to our children. So lets step up to the plate and make the right decisions in our home. Let’s get connected with other families who love the Lord. Sometimes we need to just step out of our comfortable little life styles and reach out to others for encouragement. Proverbs 14:26- “He who fears the Lord has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge.”

Mark Soto